Tarot Questions to Avoid (And Why They Keep You Stuck)
Most articles about tarot questions to avoid focus on etiquette—don't ask about death, don't ask yes/no questions. But the real questions to avoid are the ones that keep you emotionally stuck in loops of anxiety and powerlessness. These questions feel productive but actually reinforce the patterns keeping you trapped.
"Will They Come Back?" (The Waiting Game Question)
This is the most common stuck-loop question in love readings. Every time you ask it, you're reinforcing a passive stance where your happiness depends on someone else's choice.
The question assumes your fulfillment requires this specific person, you should wait rather than move forward, and their return is the only acceptable outcome.
What happens: You pull cards weekly (or daily), interpret any remotely positive card as "yes, they're coming," and stay frozen in place. Months pass. You're still asking.
The empowering reframe: "What do I need to heal to attract aligned partnership?" or "What's my next step in creating the love life I want?"
If you've been asking this question for weeks or months, read our guide on when to stop doing love readings on the same person.
"What Are They Thinking/Feeling About Me?" (The Surveillance Question)
This question turns tarot into an emotional espionage tool. You're trying to read someone's mind instead of trusting their actions.
The question assumes their internal state matters more than their behavior, you can control outcomes by knowing their feelings, and your worth depends on their opinion of you.
What happens: You get vague cards (because tarot reads energy patterns, not literal thoughts), create elaborate interpretations that fit what you want to hear, and ignore the actual evidence—they're not reaching out.
The empowering reframe: "What energy am I projecting in this connection?" or "What do I need to see clearly about this situation?"
Instead of trying to read their mind, learn to read your own energy with tarot.
"Is This Person My Soulmate?" (The Destination Question)
This question attempts to skip the actual relationship-building process and jump to cosmic validation. It's looking for permission to bypass red flags.
The question assumes "soulmate" status excuses bad behavior or incompatibility, destiny matters more than day-to-day compatibility, and there's only one right person (scarcity mindset).
What happens: If you get "yes" energy in the cards, you interpret every difficulty as a "test" rather than incompatibility. If you get "no" energy, you ask again differently until the cards cooperate.
The empowering reframe: "What am I learning from this connection?" or "Does this relationship support my growth?"
Before asking about soulmates, read about using tarot for self-love before dating.
"When Will I Meet Someone/When Will This Happen?" (The Timeline Question)
Asking tarot for dates and timelines puts you in passive waiting mode. You're treating your love life like a bus schedule instead of something you actively create.
The question assumes love happens to you rather than through you, timing is fixed rather than influenced by your readiness, and knowing the date will help (it won't—it just creates more anxious waiting).
What happens: You get a season or number, mark your calendar, and when that time passes without results, you ask again. The cards become a crutch preventing you from taking action now.
The empowering reframe: "What makes me ready for the love I want?" or "What action can I take now to align with partnership?"
For better questions to ask, explore our list of 50 love tarot questions with spread suggestions.
Why These Questions Keep You Stuck
Notice the pattern? All of these questions focus on external circumstances rather than your internal state, assume passivity (waiting, wondering, hoping), reinforce dependence on the cards for decisions, and keep attention on one specific outcome rather than your overall well-being.
Empowering questions shift the focus to what you can control: your energy, your healing, your readiness, your choices.
The questions you ask reveal what you believe about love and your role in creating it. Stuck questions create stuck energy. When you shift to empowering questions, tarot becomes a tool for growth instead of a crutch for anxiety.
If you've been asking the same love questions for months and getting nowhere, the problem isn't the cards—it's the framework. Tarot for Love Mastery teaches you how to shift from "Will they love me?" to "Am I ready to attract aligned love?"—a reframe that changes everything.
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